I got the Job. Also...where I was.

I got a job at Ocean State Job Lot. Save your well wishes until I actually survive longer than three months there.

Where I Was

There are two wishes I would take back in a heartbeat if I could. One of them is the wish that I could have a "I remember where I was" moment. To this day there are very few events in my life that still feel like claws gouging at my heart when I remember them. 9/11 is one of those days.
 When I woke up that Tuesday morning, I was in my dorm room at Lyndon State College and I didn't have a class until six-thirty. So I decided to get some laundry done while I worked on a journal entry for English class. 
In the morning I like to listen to music while I get ready so I had the radio on to the local station. As I threw my laundry into the bag the DJ read of the news articles for the day.

“And in New York, a plane crashed into the World Trade Center…”

It’s very important for me to explain this. The way the DJ read it was very fast pace and nonchalant. It certainly struck me as out of the ordinary, but as neutral as his voice was I figured it was a small plane that maybe lost an engine or had a stick malfunction. I knew there’d be something on TV because that sort of thing just doesn’t happen every day and the radio, for all it’s entertainment value, is basically background noise to keep the room from being too quiet.

I took my laundry to the basement and threw it in the machine. Then I brought my backpack upstairs into the lounge and that’s when something very odd struck me.

Two of the RA’s were milling around the doorway into the lounge. Inside there were a ton of students sitting around the room, glued to the TV. And on the television was the South Tower, smoke billowing from a very large, gaping hole in the side.

“What the hell?” I wondered out loud.
It didn’t take long to find out what was going on. A jetliner had crashed into the north tower.
Wow, I thought. That’s what the DJ was talking about.
I sat there writing in the notebook that served as my “journal” for class.
A plane has just hit the World Trade Center. I don’t know if it was an accident or not. They aren’t sure yet but everyone is frantic.
About fifteen minutes of watching the screen later I had to go downstairs and switch my laundry from the washer to the dryer. In the space of that time the second plane struck the second tower.
Now a second plane has struck, I wrote in the journal entry. All I want to know right now is what the hell is going on?

And I sat there, glued to the screen, watching as people leapt from the towers and wincing as the camera showed their descent into the ground below. In the space of time it took me to do my laundry the towers had been struck and they crumbled to the ground.

That day the news blared from radios and television sets all over the campus. I watched as they replayed the footage of the plane striking the North Tower fifteen times. One of those times the audio was so clear I could hear the impact of the plane into the tower. It’s a sound I will never be able to get from my mind.

The first thing I felt was terror. Because I can’t stop thinking about things, I had to imagine what it was like for the people trapped at the top of the tower, falling all that way, their hearts pounding as they cried out in terror. I felt sadness that I would never get to see the New York skyline from the observation deck.

Worse of all I thought, oh great. My wish is granted.


I now have a moment that I can tell my nephew and nieces, “When that happened I was…”.

Apparently I Wasn't Following The Rules...

Everyone in the Lifebridge shelter has a chore. For the last two months, my chore was the refridgerator. I was to go through everything in there and get rid of what didn't belong there. The reasons for this are simple.

1: Anyone who has had roommates knows that you need to share the space.  

2: Sometimes people forget things like fruit and other perishable items that tend to take on a life of their own if you don't get rid of them after a while.

3: You can see by the video clip that shelter policy is quite clear. Any item that does not have a proper name or date is thrown out. Anything that is left in the refridgerator over seven days is thrown out. This policy is posted very clearly on the refridgerator for anyone to see it.



So, recently there was an incident. On one such day, I was going through the refridgerator and there were a lot of bags in there that were way past the required time. Sometimes I will change the date myself, so that this person will not have to lose their groceries, but this is only in the case that I can see what's in the bag and that I can see for myself that it is not perishable.

The bottomline is, as the person responsible for the chore, it's my call and it's my ass on the line if I don't occasionally throw things out. Mainly for the reasons above.

Please note that this refridgerator is not in anyone's home. It is a courtesy provided by the Lifebridge staff. It's there so that people who get food stamps or have a little bit of income can store the occasional cold beverage, or a few things to get them through the week on days when they might miss a scheduled shelter meal.

And it's not an industrial sized refridgerator either. It's a standard home appliance that only has so much room. And when you're living with twenty or so people who need to use the same space, you can see how it's a little bit selfish and arrogant to fill each shelf up with five or six bags of your own food and drinks.

So some things got thrown out. Now, most of the staff have been supportive of my decision. I also go the extra mile and really scrub out the fridge, because some of the flimisier containers tend to break open and things get spilled. Any chef can tell you that a food spills can lead to all sorts of health hazards. And honestly, when I'm not the one doing this particular chore, the refridgerator never gets a thorough cleaning.

So because of the effort I put into it, the staff generally had no problem with it.

That is until a staff member, whom I shall refer to as Christopher was working a couple days ago.

As stated, I threw some things out. People found out quickly and threw a fit. These are the people who pretty much hang out at the shelter all day and therefore have absolutely no reason not to check the dates on their grocery bags. They have time to sit there and watch movies all day, but they can't get up off their ass and write a simple date on a piece of paper, staple it to their bag and see that it doesn't get tossed? Right.

Again, ordinarily I have the support of certain staff members when I throw things out. But not when Christopher is in charge.

"You got to follow the rules, Nate," he said. "You don't throw other people's food out."

To which I calmly replied, "But the rules very clearly state that if it's not properly dated and labeled it needs to be thrown out."

At this point Christopher exploded. Screaming at me in front of everyone and growing steadily more abusive as his voice rose. Let me put it this way, if I were to ever speak to a police office the way this guy, a professional and a paid staff member at this homeless shelter, spoke to me, I'd be arrested.

The situation grew even worse, as shelter residents followed Christopher's example and made their hostility know to me.

Naturally, by the time the director of the shelter found out, this whole situation got twisted around so that somehow this was all my fault. That I had no right to throw anything out, inspite of the rules which you can read right there in the video clip.

So there you go, readers. Once again, Lifebridge, an organization devoted to aiding the homeless teachers scores a win.

If You Read This...

I was recently screamed at by a shelter staff member, for following shelter policies in regards to certain items in the refridgerator. I am not exaggerating, I was literally screamed at. If you do not believe a shelter has the right to act this way towards it's residents, then copy and paste the letter below into an e-mail and send it out to every Letters to the Editor section of your local paper.

In this rough economic climate, it’s only natural to expect that people will suffer a bit of hard luck. As much as we would like to pretend otherwise, the homeless exist. That means there is a need for places and services to assist those people, including, but not limited to shelters.

The question a lot of people in Salem, Massachusetts have no doubt been asking is just what is the Lifebridge Shelter doing to improve this situation in our town?

When you go into the living area of Lifebridge, the first thing you are likely to notice is the people who are just sitting around, reading, watching TV, or just staring off into space. These aren’t just people who have jobs and are simply taking it easy. The majority of them are people who are there every single day, all day, unless otherwise asked to leave. Half of them will only leave of their own volition to smoke, or to run down to the store to buy cigarettes and junk food. Remember this.

There is no doubt that some of these residents are mentally ill. There are also those who have limited mobility, or disabilities that otherwise make it difficult to leave the building. Once again, the majority of the people you will meet here have no greater disability than their own overinflated sense of entitlement.

Failure or refusal on behalf of staff members to enforce certain policies fuels this entitlement. People who would lose their beds or other services in a much stricter environment mistake this laxness for the norm.

Intoxicated residents who are banned by one staff member are given the run of the place by another. The lives of residents who need oxygen to breathe at night are placed in danger as residents prop the exit to the sleeping area open, allowing cigarette smoke to blow in. Remember this as well, it will be important later.

To speak to some of the residents, you might be lead to believe that you were in the Hawthorne Hotel rather than a homeless shelter. But then again, hotels have rules and policies that are better enforced. And those people actually pay to spend the night there.

On the other end of the spectrum, you have the one percent of shelter residents who do take advantage of the services and try to improve their situations. If you see them at the shelter at all they are likely eating, sleeping, or heaven forbid taking it easy for a little bit. But they are awake and out the door early in the morning. If they do have jobs, they are faithful to their schedules and working hard to get a place to live. If they are unemployed then they are pounding the pavement in search of work.

Ironically, these are the people who suffer the most. Instead of assistance, they are given excuses. Appointments are made with their caseworkers, only to be canceled or forgotten without notice. Miscommunications between staff lead to misunderstandings that can cause these people to miss a meal, or to wind up being needlessly penalized.

Probably the worst offense of all is when a staff member who cannot properly manage their stress takes it out on a resident. This creates a hostile environment as that person’s inner circle of residents now believes that they can mistreat the victim. This is further reinforced when that staff member refuses to apologize, thus ensuring that a supposedly safe environment grows potentially dangerous.

Take a moment to think about that. As mentioned, there are mentally ill people living in this shelter. Some of these people would not be credible witnesses in a court case and very likely, if one of them were to tell you what someone did to them, you would likely dismiss them. But try to imagine a relative of yours.

Maybe someone with a similar mental illness or an elderly relative with Alzheimer’s disease, who for whatever reason has been placed in a home or other sheltered environment. How would you feel, knowing that a nurse or an orderly took out their frustrations on that loved one? Where would you draw the line? How would you feel if you were that person and you felt threatened and intimidated by people who were supposed to be there to help you?

What does this have to do with you, the citizen of Salem, Massachusetts or any other town with a similar situation to deal with? Well, at one point or another you’ve probably been asked to donate to one of these shelters.

You might have seen a booth at a fair, or attended a benefit dinner to support a homeless shelter. Or, perhaps you received a pamphlet from a place like Lifebridge, full of color photos of the staff, residents, and campus. In that pamphlet is an envelope where you would put a check or money order in one of the amounts requested.

The question you need to ask yourself is after reading this letter, do you honestly believe that this is a place you would want to donate your money? Does this sound like a place where your hard earned dollars would go towards caring for the mentally ill or for helping that once percent who just need that extra boost. Or does it sound more like you’re funding a twenty-four hour college fraternity party? Read on.

A number of the aforementioned residents, who suffer from those disabilities and limited mobility, will receive a disability check. Half of that money will go towards cigarettes. Similarly, their food stamps will pay for junk food while they enjoy full meals provided by donations from well meaning businesses and church groups. To add further insult to injury, the oxygen tanks, which many of these smokers use believe it or not, were paid for by health insurance that was provided by the state.

So in a sense, you, the tax payer have all ready paid a substantial amount for these people to just sit around, smoking, eating and reading. Do you really need to donate more money for them to do the exact same thing?

Please feel free to contact me with any further questions you have and please read my blog, The Morlock’s Voice.

More questions about Job Corps

This next article responded to questions that my readers had about Job Corps. Once again, please show your support for this blog and my goal of starting a newsletter by donating through paypal at thestreetreader@hotmail.com

These are questions that were asked in the comments section of the following two Hubs, including one question that was requested of me, which I responded to. Click the links for more information and when you're done reading my responses, check out the Amazon.com hubs for some handy items to take with you should you decide to go to Job Corps.

Note: All of the “questions” are summarized as opposed to copying and pasting the entire comment.

Bear wrote many questions within a question so I will break it down.

I am leaving for the Edison Job Corps in New Jersey and I was wondering if you are allowed to bring your own car.

If you are living on campus then odds are you will not be allowed to have your own personal vehicle there. Parking spaces at most centers are limited and will be reserved for staff and visitors, not to mention the question of would happen if your car were vandalized or stolen.

Are you allowed to leave campus in an emergency?

The term “emergency” is a very loaded concept on a Job Corps campus. A friend of mine once had to leave the campus of Northland's in Vergennes, Vermont because his own mother passed away and he needed to be at her funeral. They needed all kinds of confirmation from various people before he was “allowed” to leave, which was ridiculous since he was an adult and not there on a court case.

Ideally I would say that yes, you are allowed to leave the campus for any amount of time you need, so long as you give them plenty of notice and aren't on any kind of campus restrictions. But your emergency is going to have to be very specific and don't be surprised if they ask you to provide a corpse as proof.

When do you begin to get your Bi-Weekly Stipend?

You start getting that right away. If you started during a pay week you probably won't get an actual stipend until the very next payday. But if it's your first time in Job Corps you will get a 25 dollar bonus at your orientation. Note: You only get the orientation bonus once. You will not get it if you transfer to another center.

Clothing Allowance

This is basically how the clothing allowance and the clothing run itself works. Lets say your first day is April 15^th, (The day the Titanic sank coincidentally). You are placed on a schedule along with every other student that joins with you. It could be as soon as two months and it can be as long as six before your turn comes along. This is because each center receives a specific amount of money for each student at a given time and they need to plan the shopping trips accordingly. The same goes for every subsequent clothing run your scheduled for.

Depending on what center you live at and whether or not the store you're shopping for clothes at has any standing beef with said center, you will be taken on a van, with the other students who were in line to receive new clothes and six staff members who will act as chaperone's to make sure you buy the appropriate clothes. At Northland we went to Wal*Mart, until something came up that I don't fully understand and from that point on they started going to K-mart. When I went to the Loring Center in Limestone, ME, we went to a privately owned local shop in Presque Isle, which was actually very nice.

You're typically allowed to buy two packages of underpants, two packages of socks, or some variation thereof. But the clothes you buy will depend entirely on your trade.

For the Business Technologies trade, for example, I was required to get khakis or slacks, a pair of shoes that would be appropriate for the workplace (I refused to wear loafers, but regular black shoes were fine) and button down shirts. But you are not actually given the money. The staff who are with you will have the voucher in hand and they conduct the transaction.

Depending on how tight the schedule is, you are usually given time to do shopping with your own money. So if you know you'll be going on a clothing run this is a good chance to stock up on some of the items I will include later in this article.

Do they Give Driving lessons?

Yes. They will even pay for you to get your driving test. So that is one potential upside of going to Job Corps.

Dee Writes: I am a sophomore in high school and my grades are low. Do you think Job Corps is a good idea to get my Diploma/GED or should I stay in HS?

Dee, I first want to let you know that I feel for you. I have had responses from parents of kids who are having difficulty in high school and they themselves are wondering if it wouldn't be such a bad idea to send their kids of to Job Corps.

The truth is it's up to you and as a minor, it's up to your parents. If they support you in this decision and it is what you feel is right for you then that is what you need to do.

High School is rough, especially these days. Now if your difficulties are because of a learning disability, one thing I can honestly say is that the teachers at the Job Corps I went to are not notoriously helpful to people with those kinds of difficulties. Some can be very arrogant and very demeaning and yet there are a few gems.

I honestly can't tell you what to expect from every single center but I can tell you that Job Corps is not an easy alternative to what you're going through right now. In fact it tends to be worse, because at school you can go home at the end of the day. At Job Corps, if you're a residential student you go back to your dorm and the drama of the school day just follows you and can get worse.

So if it's just grades and you're just a sophomore, I would see if you can get any extra help at all from a tutor, your teachers, or anyone. Your guidance counselor might even know of alternatives to Job Corps that would better suit your situation.

It's up to you and I hope you make the right decision for yourself.

Do they allow Ipods and Cellphones during free time?

Every center has it's rules about cellphones and things like Ipods, MP3 Players and now a days I bet they even have rules about wireless notebooks and Internet phones. So as far as the rules for each center goes that's a tuffy even if you did call them up and ask: because ninety-nine percent of the time the staff can't keep track of all the rule changes.

The policy of Northlands Job Corps was simple. Cellphones and Ipods needed to be left in your dorms during class or they could be confiscated. That policy was very loosely enforced so you'll have to decide if it's worth the risk to be break it at your center.

At the Loring Center you had to give your cellphone to the guy in charge of security until you went to some kind of course. I didn't have a cellphone at the time so it wasn't an issue. After you take the course then presumably you can have your cellphone.

How Big Are the Rooms?

Again, this varies from center to center.

At the Northlands Center you could be in a room with up to eight other roommates or you could just have the one. Single rooms were a privilege that you had to work hard to earn. Yes, I did earn my way into a really nicely sized single room by the time I left there, so it is possible. The rooms may be differently sized depending on what dorm you're in but for the most part you will have adequate leg room.

The Loring Center was an old Air force Base so all of the rooms were two person rooms and you shared a bathroom with the two guys in the next room. I actually liked the living accommodations at Loring much better because there are really only three people to blame if your bathroom gets trashed.

The Truth of Job Corps

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What Job Corps is: A government backed training program that can teach you a trade that may lead to a successful career. They give you a clothing allowance, which I found came in handy quite nicely and if you don't have your high school diploma they will help you achieve your GED.

At the Loring Job Corps Center in Limestone, Maine you can even get your official diploma.

You do get a bi-weekly stipend that increases from the minimum fifteen dollars to the maximum fifty dollars. Once you have completed your trade and earned your GED (if it applies) you get 1200 dollars for completing.

What Job Corps isn't: An alternative to college. This is a huge mistake that many people make and they end up paying for it with their time and their sanity. So let me clarify this point: No matter what the staff members or whatever students who have been brainwashed by the staff members tell you: Job Corps is not like college at all.

The first thing to remember is that as a new student of Job Corps, you are at the bottom of the pecking order. You are not an equal to anyone so check your ego and your personality at the door.

Residential Advisers, Teachers and students in "leadership positions" will treat all new students like they are beneath them. So find out whose good side you need to get on fast and the experience will go by more smoothly.

There are no innocent people, either. If someone else has done something that violates the campus rules, or in some other way upsets or annoys a staff member, everyone is punished.

Depending on what center you go to, the people in the nearby town or wherever you go for clothing and food runs will automatically expect you to steal from them. So just remember that in Job Corps, it is death by association, automatically. It will be up to you to raise yourself above that standard.

Now is this to say that you should avoid Job Corps all together? Absolutely not. By all means, if this is what you want to do, go for it. But here are some suggestions to make the experience go by a lot better.

Ask around. And I don't mean asking out reach counselors, who will tell you anything to get you into a particular center. E-mail students from your particular center and ask about what the campus is like.

The live journal website has groups of Job Corps students from all over the country, who will give you honest reviews of the place they've spent a lot of time.

Buy snack cheap foods as often as possible. Noodles, snack foods, twelve packs of soda, etc, and keep your supply as full as possible. The business savvy student can make a really good killing off of his fellow students. But be careful, because depending on the rules of your particular center you can be terminated for "hustling" or "loan sharking". This is, however, a good way to cement your place near the top of the pecking order.

Buy your own shampoo and soap, toothpaste, toothbrush, and towel. Because the stuff they give you will not suffice.

Keep your pants on. I won't go into the numerous compromising positions you can find yourself in when you try to have intercourse with another student on the campus. It's not worth the risk. (On the other side of the coin, if you absolutely cannot control yourself, the campus Wellness Center does have condoms and other necessary precautions.)

Get up early. Don't wait for the staff to wake you up.

Shower! I cannot emphasize this point enough. If you're in the soft trades, shower in the morning, but if you're working in the hard manual labor trades, where you will be sweating like a hog shower in the afternoon before or after dinner, but before your dorm's headcount. If you go too long without a shower you risk getting placed on what is called a hygiene contract, and lets face it, the center has enough of a leash on you with out it.

Keep your room clean at all costs. If you have only one roommate this should be easy and if you're on your own it's even better. Just remember, if your roommate or roommates screw up and the room fails, it's your problem as well. You could end up being restricted from certain campus activities if an inspection fails, so keep this in mind.

Men: If you shave, buy yourself an electric razor. Trust me on that one.

Women: Buy your own personal supplies. Trust me on that one.

Get involved with activities! Every campus has it's own recreational center, so there's always at least something to do. Getting involved in as many ways as possible is great way to keep your sanity.

Look for ways to score brownie points. If this means volunteering to do extra chores, or helping to clean the gym/rec area, do it. It will pay off in the end.

These are just a few suggestions that can really help with your time at Job Corps. Above all else, heed this advice, which they will tell you a thousand times in your first week there: Avoid the Drama!

Wish Me Luck

The Human Resources department for the City of Salem was putting out feelers for garage attendant/cashiers, so I rushed down to the town office, only stopping at the shelter to get my spiffy blazer and take a hit of body spray. (externally, of coruse)

Hopefully I get called in for an interview. Because what better way for the Town of Salem to help a homeless man than by giving him a job so that he doesn't have to be homeless anymore...right?

Better Than Nothing Job Leads.

I had two possible leads today. Both are mostly dead ends because one: As much as I can walk eight or nine miles round trip, it doesn't nessecarily mean that I want to walk that much every single day for what amounts to a handful of grueling hours a week for just barely minimum wage.

You may say, "It's better than nothing."

You'd be wrong. A job like that is literally nothing as much as I would willingly commit to it, that is if I got it after the interview process, I wouldn't be making nearly enough to actually do much other than scrape by. I might get out of the shelter, but food would be a constant stretch.

Sure, I could go to the shelter for lunch and dinner, maybe. As long as I wasn't working at the time they were serving, because after I'm no longer a resident there they have no obligation to help me.

The point is, I need a job that lets me take care of both home and meals. Jumping on "better than nothing" should only be a last resort and at the very least it should be a second job as opposed to your only one. A "better than nothing" job should be a newspaper route while you're working at Denny's, or assisting an elderly woman in her home in between shifts at the Family Dollar.

Hell, the meger amount I was making off of tarot readings while I was working full time at Rite Aid was "better than nothing".

The Ace of Swords



My Cross To Bear

 Some days it can be hard just to find a reason to get out of bed. I try to push myself to getting up at five every morning, so that when I do start a job, I'm in a routine.

The job search is going slowly and although I'm in no danger of losing my bed, my morale slips a little bit everyday.

It wouldn't be so bad, except everytime I walk through town, I get slapped in the face with a reminder of why I'm here.

Laurie Cabot was standing literally just a block from the shelter. I wouldn't dare approach her though, mostly out of respect. But mostly because I don't want her to have a poor opinion of me. As a figurehead in this town, she could have some sway in whether or not I get and can keep the tarot license and I just can't stand the idea of anything else getting in my way of it.

So I'm working on yet another blog. This one deals with my experienecs with Asperger's and the diagnosis itself. I don't expect to be the next Alex Plank, but maybe it will be enough to pay the bills.

Taking Care of Your Needs

When you're homeless, there is still one main authority you have to obey. That is your body. Oh and the police. You should obey the police, or your body will be hurt. But the body is the next big authority you have to obey.

In most cities or towns where a homeless shelter exists, you will also find a clinic that is free of charge to people with certain levels of income. If there isn't a designated place for this then go to the nearest hospital and ask what services they offer.

If this is an emergency, the hospital cannot refuse you even if you are unable to pay or have no insurance. In states like Massechusetts, it is actually against the law to not have insurance and so it will be offered to you free of charge for as long as you can't afford it.

Now, what if it's not an immediate emergency? Maybe you have a headache, or perhaps your diabetes medication is low, or maybe you're trying to manage incontinence. It can be very embarassing to ask another adult about these things when you feel like you should be able to take care of yourself.

But think about it. Most symptoms may just be minor things, but they can also add up to something worse. A minor headache could be the warning signs of a tumor. Diabetes can be deadly if not handled and there are a host of other major illnesses that can be treated if you get the symptoms checked out early.

So it's very important to know that if a clinic is available to you, take advantage of it. Swallow your pride. Yes, there is a chance you will be judged. I won't deny the number of times I've felt like I was under a microscope during the time I've been homeless. But at the end of the day, the last thing you want to do is to die of something that you could have easily avoided if you had taken care of it.

If you go to the clinic and you're not happy with the doctor's answer, go for a second opinion. You know your own body after all. If you feel something is wrong you need to press it until you find someone who is willing to take a closer look. Reading up on the symptoms may be a good way to get a dialogue going with your doctor.

Some shelters also have an on-staff, or a regular visiting nurse to take care of minor things like getting medications and doing TB tests and vaccinations. If you're not sure how to make an appointment with this nurse ask the shelter staff.

Above all remember, you are an adult. You are a human being with needs but you are no longer a child. If you are sick or hurt, no one else is going to take care of you.

In other news

The downside of people suffering from genuine mental illness is that they can't get help unless they seek it. And it's a little hard to seek help for something when you personally believe that the president has placed a chip in your brain.

There's also a phenomenon known as malingering, which is basically when a person pretends to be mentally ill in order to get a bed in a hospital or a mental home. They take advantage of the food, the bed and basically treat the place like it's a hotel. This takes space from people who actually need help, or who are genuinely unable to take care of themselves due to actual mental illnesses that prevent them from functioning, like schizophrenia and certain stages of bi-polar disorder.

When it comes right down to it, homeless shelters are being overrun by the mentally ill who cannot seek the help they need, even if they were cogniscent to ask for it. These are people that very well could recieve treatment, but their condition only worsens because of the presence of malingerers and professionals in the psychiatric field who play god. (Don't get me started on them)

At times it really does make me wonder how far off we are from a V for Vendetta style turn for the worse, where people who are mentally and financially unfit are rounded up for medical tests.

Oh, wait...

Going to Experiment Today

I need to get some of my writing out there. The goal is to attract more traffic to my hubpage and my blog. Salem is a big touristy area and there are always people reading the ads and such that are posted all over town.

So I'll be printing out the profile page from my hub and posting it along with the address in as many public areas as possible. It might be worth it if score even one or two regular readers. On the other hand it may just turn me into a thorn in everyone's side, but you have to work with what you have.

By the way, if you're ever in a homeless shelter, keep one simple rule in mind: The Staff Are Gods.

This can never be truer than when you have no job and all you do is sit around the shelter day in and day out. If you are physically disabled and all you can do is sit there and read and eat, then you are in no position to debate it when a staff member asks you to do something.

You can complain, certainly. Complaining is a right, not a privilege. But understand that your complaints have absolutely no grounding here. If you are removed from the shelter and you refuse to leave, the police can be called and the police will always take the side of the shelter staff over you.

This is something I would love to say that I can help to improve with The Morlock's Voice, but if I did you'd miss the point. The Morlock's Voice isn't aimed at improving life in the shelters. It's aimed at getting people the fuck out of there and back on their own two feet.

The Beverly Shelter may be closing.

I'm told it's due to financial reasons. But it makes me nervous anyhow. Lifebridge may be set, but the people in Beverly who needed a bed will be flocking elsewhere for a place to sleep.

I never got a call back from Best Buy. Tomorrow I'm going to try to print out a couple of my hubpage articles and post them in various parts of town. Maybe if someone reads the articles they'll find it interesting enough to go to the hub and that will increase the traffic and/or ad clicks.

Phone is running out of minutes tomorrow

You never appreciate the invention of the cellphone until you've gone a week without being able to call anyone. Oh, it tells you when you have voicemail. And the voicemail is a pain to get into from any other phone.

But my biggest challenge is this. 1: If I do manage to land a job interview and they are interested in hiring me, they have no way of getting a hold of me. 2: I could give them the shelter number, but having a homeless shelter for a contact number is a crapsshoot.

The staff who pick up immediately announce where you're calling. And if the people I'm trying to work for have a problem with Lifebridge, or have a bad impression of the people who live there, that can kill your chances for getting the job. Also, the staff at Lifebridge can take a message, but even if I'm standing right there in front of them, they cannot tell you I'm there. This is supposedly for your "protection", and I could see if it was an abusive boyfriend trying to verify where his girlfriend was at. But in the case of absolutely needing to maintain a constant line of communication with someone, that's where things get tricky.

Projects in the works: The Morlock's Voice is mostly a pipe dream right now.
                                  Putting together a collection of tales that I could try to sell online through Kindle.
                                 

Tax Day. Also the day Winter Protocol is supposed to end.

Winter Protocol is something the shelters offer to help get people out of the cold during the winter months. It allows people to make use of the extra cots and if there are no more beds available, they can sleep in the main area upstairs. Every shelter does it differently, I suppose.

But now that it's warmer there should be fewer people in the dorm when I get back today. I'm a permanent resident until I find my own place, so I'm set.

I just hope I hear back from Best Buy today. Honestly, my chances of getting anything remotely productive done are going to be null and void if I can't get a steady source of income.

Job Interview was today

Strangely enough I don't feel as anxious as I usually do. And yet, Best Buy is the first strong bite I've had in a while, so if I don't get a second interview or a job offer, I'm pretty much screwed for a while.

In other news, a man who once stayed at the shelter I'm in passed away recently. He was in his own place so kudos on that, but his death makes me a little shaky. Mostly because I have this fear of dying right now, homeless. And even though there's a ton of ways to contact my family, no one will make the effort and I'll just wind up in a mass grave somwhere with a number for a marker.

That's another major goal of The Morlock's Voice. No one will ever pass away nameless and I will set up a fund so that if a homeless person does pass away and no family comes to claim the body, he or she will have a proper funeral with all of the fixings.

Spread the word.

I'm glad I'm getting readers. But I love feedback, so if you think any of this is a good idea, please, have at it and send my blog around.

The Morlock's Voice is a good idea. We don't need a shortage of good ideas, we need more good ideas. That said, if you're still squeamish about sending money directly to me, here are some other ways you can help.

Check out my ideas for Iphone Aps. If you have any creative ability at all with the Iphone/Android programming languages, give me a buzz and help me out. Lets work together to try to better the world over all.

Because I'd Like to One Day Have Investors

Investors are going to be a big thing. Angel investors I think they're called. Even if it's an investment in time or in skill, (IE, a box of donuts for the writers, access to a computer with the Quark Program and the printer to print the papers out on, etc) without other people getting and staying on board, a project just can't get done.

No, seriously, think about it. How effective would Joan of Arc had been if the King of France didn't supply her with an army? Would Martin Luther King have been terribly effective in promoting the Civil Rights movement if people didn't show up to his meetings? Probably not.

So, if I'm going to get the Morlock's Voice up and running, I need help, no questions asked.

However, you're going to have questions and that's the purpose of this blog. To tell you what the Morlock's Voice is all about and what I intend to do with it.

1: It will not just be a one-sided rag. Yes, submissions from homeless people and people who are struggling to pay the bills or find work will be a huge backbone of this paper. But it will not be page after page of, "Rich people suck. Obama is at fault. Such and such from the shelter needs to stop being such a bitch, etc, etc."

But the paper will also include information, such as how not act like a jackass that no one wants to be around. Take this morning, for example.

I was feeling particularly sick and stressed today. And this young lady, who I will call Joyce, was singing in her annoying scratchy way. And let me clarify for those of you who need everything spelled out, this woman is not the next Susan Boyle. (Although, since when does a lack of talent stop anyone from getting a contract these days)

Yes, it was in the dining room. But it was six in the morning and I don't know about the rest of you, but there's only so much noise I can take in the morning. And it takes quite a bit of slow, ducks-pecking-at-my-stomach style annoyances before I'll allow someone to get under my skin. This morning, Joyce was well on her way to the muscle layer.

I asked her quite politely, "Joyce, can you please not do that right now. I'm not feeling well."

"Why?" Her Scratchiness replied. "I'm not singing in your ear."

"I know," I said. "But it's early in the morning and I am not feeling well. Can you please just not do that right now?"

Rinse, lather, repeat. I finally just got up and moved to another table.

Mind you, if someone were annoying this woman in anyway she would not hesitate to complain. (And she annoys quite a few people.)

How would I address incidents like these in the Morlock's Voice, you ask? Read on.

When you're living in a group situation, you have to remember that you are dealing with a lot of different people who are as different from each other as night from day. Some people have disabilities, or conditions, or even just tramatic events in their lives that have lead them to this situation.

That being said, it is very important that we try to respect everyone equally. Certainly I can't ask you to stop couging in the middle of the night, because that is not something you can control. Maybe you or your bunkmate suffer from bathroom related issues, and as adults, you may have to make adjustments for people in this area too.

But there are also behaviors that we certainly can control. Things that may be pleasurable or common to us, but may annoy others. Whatever the reason, if something you are doing bothers someone else, and it is reasonably within your abilities to stop doing this thing, just stop doing it. Or go somewhere that it is acceptable to do such a thing.

If you can learn to respect the feelings of the people in the shelter, you can certainly take this with you to the workplace. The reverse of course is, how do you expect to survive in a workplace situation when you can't make an effort to get along with the people you live with?

And that's just a small sample of what people can expect to read in The Morlock's Voice.

Now, what about the otherside of the coin? Yes, submissions dealing with interactions with the staff members will be accepted. Because there are staff members in the shelters who abuse their power and the worse part is, the people who are running them aren't much better. There are some gems, but they're outnumbered by the power hungry employees who seem to be oblivious to the fact that they could wind up on our side of the desk in a heartbeat.

And while I will encourage contributers to write articles based on events in the shelters, again, the point of this is not to be a bashing rag. It's to give those of us who are trying to get of that situation a voice to present to the general publc.

Lets say Peter Wicks is struggling to find work. He doesn't get it. He has no criminal background, he has no drug problems, and according to his caseworker at the shelter, he works hard and gets his chores done on time. He has an impressive background of employment, but for some reason, none of the prospective employers are biting the line.

Peter Wicks can now write an article about his experiences in pounding the pavement. Who he's gone to for help, whether he feels they've been effective, and best yet, the article lets him present a small portion of his resume. Obviously not the whole thing, for space's sake, but enough that Joeseph Tanner, owner of Airline Subcontractors, might read it and think, "Damn, we need this guy on our team. I'll give him a call right away."

Now, what else do I want to do with The Morlock's Voice? Well, I'm charging for advertising space, which anyone can rent. Bands who are playing in the area the place is distributed, small businesses, etc. Advertising space is what pays for most of those free papers you come across. But what will I do with the money?

Obviously a portion of it is going to go to keeping the paper going. Then I'll pay myself a small wage so that I can afford to spend time with it, naturally. Hey, the shelter staff at Lifebridge make 11 dollars an hour doing what they do, so don't even judge me for trying to make a small profit from this.

The major use of the money is going to go to the contributers. So I've chosen to publish Peter Wick's article. Peter's case manager at the shelter sent me a letter stating that Peter is in fact working hard to find work, so I know he's not just some burnt out crackhead trying to score easy cash. I will send Peter a check or money order for twenty-five dollars.

Anyone who submits according to the guidelines will be accepted. Peter's article may not get published if he sends it in, say, on April. But it will eventually be published if I have accepted it. However, once he is paid, he will not be eligible to recieve payment or submit another article for a full year. This is so other people will have a chance to be read and also get paid.

In that way, you, the investor or the person renting advertising space, have helped a homeless or struggling man without having to hand him money on the street and wonder what he's going to spend it on. And, because of my careful guidelines and my vow to follow up on every submission that I accept, I will be able to assure you that the money is not going to get blown on booze, tobacco and illegal drugs.

Subtle...Subtle as a Rock...Thrown through your window, at the speed of light, light, light

Sing the title to the tune of Solid as a Rock to get the joke. In the meantime, if you're ever curious about what I do in my spare time, this is pretty much it. As long as there are places to access the Internet for free, I will always be there to tell people about my day and about what I have encountered in my travels. If I am able to, I always put pictures up.

My laptop died on me recently. I am currently homeless, but I have a job interview with Best Buy coming up, so wish me luck. If you're able to, burn a green candle and send me your postive energy/prayers. Green represents growth, financial gain, and health. Plus, it's one of my three favorite colors. (You'll have to read on to learn the others)

So if you want to read some of my more solid pieces, follow the linky here. http://hubpages.com/profile/NateSean

This blog will be devoted to my efforst to get a newsletter out there. The Morlock's Voice will be successful.

Today I spent some time asking around to see what kind of permits I might need to publish a newsletter that I would charge advertising space in. According to the Salem PD (because the town clerks office is completely useless), the only thing I would need a permit for is if I were distributing something door to door.

And the Morlock's Voice would be more of a waiting room newsletter. The kind you would find in coffee houses, malls, convenience stores, libraries and other places where you can find free literature.

As I am not nearly credible enough to ask for donations up front, I can offer my one true skill. In addition to being a writer, you will notice in my hubpage account that I am also an accomplished Tarot reader. Not as big as Christian Day and definitely not as unethical as Miss Cleo, I am confident enough in my abilities to give honest and direct tarot readings.

I have done them for profit and pleasure and I have met with much success in my home state. It is, after all, why I'm here in Salem, Massechusetts. But before I can read tarot cards for profit, here in town that is, I need a lisence, which I do not yet have and will not be eligible to apply for until I have lived in Salem for a full year. That won't be for a few months now.

However, should you send me money via my paypal account along with an e-mail as to the best time to call you, I would certainly be willing to give you a ring. And well, should the conversation you have paid me to have lead to me grabbing my tarot cards and reading them in a manner that would be conducive to you recieving a fortune, well that would just be a gosh darned coincidence now wouldn't it? They'd be hard pressed to fine me over accepting payment for a tarot reading, when they'd be the ones answering to the Federal government on wiretapping charges now wouldn't they?

After all, it's up to you how you spend your money, right? And not only would it help me reach my goal in the long run, but it would actually reinforce my original reason for being here in witch city.

The Morlock's Voice

The city of Salem has a problem with the homeless shelter. Well, guess what Town of Salem, we don't like being homeless.

The shop owners don't like "mall rats" hanging out in the mall. Those same shop owners hold seances and "cleansing rituals" for celebrities who make the slightest offensive remark towards "warlocks". Tell me it wasn't for publicity and try to keep a straight face as you do it.

And the thing is, yes, there are people who are just lazy. They know they're getting three free meals a day and that if they played their cards right they were going to get a bed that they wouldn't lose. So long as they pretended to fill out a job application every day, no one is going to kick them out.

Then there's the mentally ill who have no other place to go because those homes got shut down ages go. You can't exactly kick them to the curb, can you?

But what about the rest of us who are struggling? I saw a family in the shelter yesterday who had stopped by for dinner. It made me so depressed and angry. The parents probably weren't much older than me, maybe mid thirties. But the kids were four and three, the same age as my nieces. These people were struggling and they just needed to feed their kids.

Some of the residents who are "permanent fixtures", the people I mentioned up top, wouldn't give up their seats until a staff member had to coerce them. And I can't tell you how many times I've willingly surrendered my seat to an elderly woman, just because the "cliques" in the shelter have to act like high schoolers. (And some of them have the mentality of high school teens, but I digress)

The point is, while the rest of you (general population, not anyone specifically) look down on those of us who are struggling, you fail to realize one thing.

People like me are here because while I could have been making thousands of dollars this Halloween by doing tarot readings without a lisence, I decided that following the rules was best. So I've been waiting a year and in the meantime, my bosses at Staples decided to play with words and throw some people under the train tracks, myself included.

So my only legitimate means of supporting myself was gone, and for three months I struggled to find a job.

But, who gives a rat's ass about me? My family, sure, but they're in Vermont. And no, I don't feel like trudging back to Vermont to become a burden to them. The going gets tough, the tough gets running back to their mothers? Is that how you make it in this world, by allowing people to kick you in the ribs and get away with it?

Hell no. I came to this revelation when I saw a hawk kill a pigeon recently. The weak little prey bird's neck was crushed between the hawk's claws as the hawk looked at me, almost daring me to try to take what it had earned.

The point is, I have earned the right to live in Salem. I will do what I came here to do and if I do leave, it will not be because a bunch of money grubbing publicty mongers drove me out with pitchforks and torches.

If you want to be a bunch of overstuffed pigeons and get in my way as I try to carve my niche, well just remember, I'm the hawk.

So, inspiration struck me yesterday, when I found a monthly newsletter in the college library. I'd seen it before in the lobby of the hospital cafeteria.

It's one of those free one page rags with a bunch of nonsensical crap written there.

I'm doing some reaserch today about how to get a newsletter up and running. I want to have it mass produced so I can have a wide distribution.

The newsletter will be geared entirely towards people who are either homeless and trying to find a job and home, or people who are just struggling financially where homelessness may be the end result.

Advertisers will be able to pay for space in the newsletter, which helps local business. And the demographic I mentioned, which is probably a lot bigger than you can imagine, will have the opportunity to submit articles, poetry, and information that is important to them. For this they will get paid a set amount, which will be a plus for them because not only will people hear what they have to say, but they will have a little cash for whatever they happen to need.

We could post job ads, the shelters and soup kitchens can submit mealtimes and other announcements.

In the long run, it would serve a very large niche market while keeping people aware that yes, we are homeless. But we're human beings who have a voice and deserve to be treated as such.

I'm tired of people lumping entire groups into a category. I'm tired of shelter staff who think they are above it all, and think they can get away with abusing their power just because they were having a bad day.

I'm tired of potential employers turning us away at the gate because we fell on hard times and, stupid us, we decided to be human beings who need a place to eat and sleep.

So, in anticipation of some minor chance of success, I have decided to call the newsletter The Morlock's Voice.

It's a reference to HG Wells, The Time Machine, wherein an evolutionary divide of the upper and lower classes leads to two distinct species. The Eloi, who are basically beautiful cattle that eat, sleep and reproduce. And the Morlocks, who still work underground, but also farm and harvest the Eloi for food.

I really don't think that's so far off. Quite a few people in that shelter have jobs that are pretty menial, but serve the higher purpose of making the world of the "wealthy" a better and more efficient place to live.

And eventually, people are going to become so dependant on us, that the natural course of action will be to act surprise as we approach them with sheering knives and dinner forks.

Okay, maybe that's a logical extreme. But the metaphor is there. Thoughts and comments are appreciated.

I have some experience working on newsletters and I have shadowed editors before. But any advice and support you may have would be invaluable.